So I'm on the couch which serves as Samm's office chair with my new laptop(!!) compliments of my church. I am wrestling with the freedom I have. I don't have to get up early, I don't have to get dressed (every day). The good news is I have a lot of homework starting next week which will spin me into having lots to do. And I am already spending way too much time working on stuff for youth group.
How do free-lancers do it? How do you feel like you are working and more importantly when do you know you are done? Last night I was working on a letter to parents until 11:30. Yet I feel like I haven't "worked" in days. It's a funny concept, work. I guess good goals, check lists that are realistic. Planning the things that you want and then accepting the day as successful.
I found a Moody grad (Sara Bergoff) on facebook today and discovered she is sort of an atheist now. I read her husband's blog about "disevangelism" and Samm commented on it.
It made me freshly aware not that what I believe is not just "nice" and "good" and within the rules. (Which for me, are drawing points or being a Christian because I like following rules, generally). But Christianity is crazy and costly and shockingly invisible but true. I hear the questions he raised. About the misogyny in Scripture, about the seemingly unjust systems in Israel's early judicial system.
I think about my good kids at church, how old they were/are when they learned the "s-word" and how they probably have never met an atheist. And how I have to help them realize that what they believe/act like they believe/think they should believe is crazy, beautiful, shocking, rocky.
It's daunting.
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